Burnout: Why we're all exhausted and struggling to slow down

And what to do about it

Do you know what’s been a huge continual theme in the therapy room over the last few years? BURNOUT!

Have you ever felt like no matter how much you do, it’s never enough? 

Like you’re constantly running on empty but still pushing forward because stopping feels impossible? 

If that sounds familiar, you’re not alone. Burnout is more than just feeling tired - it’s the deep, overwhelming exhaustion that creeps into your body, mind, and overall well-being. And in today’s world, it’s practically a rite of passage.

Why Are We All So Burnt Out?

Burnout doesn’t just happen overnight. It builds slowly, fed by a culture that glorifies busyness and productivity. Here’s why so many of us feel like we’re drowning in exhaustion:

• Productivity guilt – We’ve been conditioned to believe that resting is unproductive. If we’re not constantly ticking things off our to-do list, we feel lazy, as if our worth is measured by how much we can achieve in a day.

• The ‘do more’ culture – Hustle culture tells us we should always be striving for more: more success, more side hustles, more experiences, more self-improvement. But ‘more’ comes at a cost, and often, that cost is our well-being.

• Being switched on 24/7 – Thanks to smartphones, emails, and social media, we never truly switch off. Work bleeds into personal time, and ‘relaxing’ now involves scrolling through endless feeds that make us feel like we’re still not doing enough.

• Struggling to slow down – Many of us grew up being rewarded for overworking. I remember getting certificates for 100% attendance at school, as if never resting was something to be proud of. Taking time off work for mental health days, saying no, lowering expectations on ourselves, using annual leave for our own good and not for jobs - it seems to be too difficult for such a big portion of us.

• The myth of work-life balance – We’re told to find balance, but in reality, most of us are juggling so much that the idea of a true work-life balance feels laughable. When work emails, deadlines, and responsibilities invade our evenings and weekends, where does the ‘life’ part fit in?

It's so important to recognise that if this sounds like you - you are not failing. You are not lazy. Exhaustion is not a personal failing or a result of individual choices.

Exhaustion is a systemic issue!! Actually, Peterson (2020) argues that millennials especially have been particularly affected by economic insecurity, precarious employment, and the constant pressure to optimise their lives.

------- We are quite frankly, in a widespread epidemic of burnout -------

The Toll It Takes on Us

Burnout isn’t just feeling ‘a bit tired.’ It’s exhaustion that seeps into every part of you:

• Mentally, it can lead to brain fog, lack of concentration, anxiety, and even depression. Exhausted people are more likely to have car collisions, and people with brain fog are increasingly isolated and unfulfilled in life because of difficulty connecting with people and suffering with memory loss and lack of focus.

• Physically, it manifests as headaches, sleep problems, chronic fatigue, a weakened immune system and quite often - autoimmune disease. Gabor Mate (2003) talks about this and even goes further to suggest that long term stress on the body can cause cancer and heart disease. Have you ever put off taking a sick day, only to have illnesses keep cropping up when you finally have a holiday due - I mean, your stress has to come out sometime!

• Emotionally, it makes us feel detached, unmotivated, and even resentful of the things we once enjoyed. Feeling unsatisfied and unfulfilled is an extremely hard place to be - it impacts your well-being, hinders your growth, your happiness, and overall life satisfaction. We were not meant to live in long term burnout!!

  
  

With all of these - it's vital we recognise the impact on our futures. If we are mentally, physically and emotionally impacted, think about how little energy and capacity we have for caregiving and parenting. Or for enjoyable activities and self care. The next generation are watching us - watching what we value, watching how we choose to live. Watching us create new norms.

So, What Can We Do?

If you’re reading this and thinking, this sounds exactly like me, but you feel overwhelmed because it feels impossible, just remember that change comes in small steps. You may have extra responsibilities, a demanding job, you may have many plates to spin, but you absolutely can find new ways of being - it’s in the little things you do.

As a therapist, I help people navigate this very struggle - bridging the gap between knowing what needs to change and actually making it happen. If you’ve tried all the self-care tips but still feel stuck, I can help you explore what’s getting in the way and find strategies that actually work for you.

It's time to give yourself permission to slow down. Rest is not a luxury — it’s essential. 

Here’s a place for you to start - think about some of the following and reflect on what may be acting as a blocker for you and let’s go from there…

• Set boundaries – Turn off notifications after work, say no to extra commitments, and protect your personal time. Yes, it may be hard for various reasons, but if you don't do it, no one else will. 

• Challenge productivity guilt – You don’t have to earn rest. Doing nothing sometimes is productive in itself. Finding calm in the chaos is one of my favourite mantras. You don't need to have a perfectly clean home to be able to enjoy a cup of tea.

• Reconnect with what actually matters – Not everything needs to be a hustle or a side project. Find joy in small moments, just for the sake of it.

• Prioritise real rest – Scrolling on your phone isn’t resting. Sleep, fresh air, quiet moments, connection with yourself - these are what truly recharge you.

Burnout won’t disappear overnight, but recognising it is the first step. 

You deserve to feel rested, present, and well - not just ‘functioning.’ It’s time we stop glorifying exhaustion and start valuing ourselves beyond our productivity. 

Because honestly? You are already enough.

References

Maté, G. (2003). When the body says no: The cost of hidden stress. Wiley.

Petersen, A. H. (2020). Can't even: How millennials became the burnout generation. Little, Brown.